Po' Smedley's Life And Brain Drippings
or..Things That Make My Wife Laugh
Published on June 29, 2006 By PoSmedley In Life Journals
6 weeks into the pregnancy and my wife has finally discovered what a comedian I am.

These are things that make her laugh.

"Honey, you shouldn't eat that, it has (caffiene, sugar, carbs, a non-Splenda artificial sweetner)."

"I can handle poopy diapers. I pick up the dog's shit, don't I?"

"If it's a boy we could call him...
Cotton?
Cash?
Cadence?
Levi?'

"If it's a girl we could call her
Journey?
Carmelita?
Gabrielle?"

"You know you shouldn't do that."

"Of course I will get up in the middle of the night with you."

Things that REALLY make her laugh...

"How hard can it be?"

"But I like the playpen with the changing table."

"What do you mean I won't be able to use a changing table?"

"Then why do they even make changing tables?"

"OOOh. I like the little sheepies!" (Don't ask.)

"But it says right here that the curved bottle is better for the baby."

"If I can handle you when you got food poisoning, I can handle a little baby spew."

"Honey, will you stop explaining every little thing to me. I'll figure it out for myself as we go along."

"Honey, will you stop explaining every little thing to me. I'll figure it out for myself as we go along. I'm a grown man."

"Honey, will you stop explaining every little thing to me. I'll figure it out for myself as we go along. I'm a grown man. I've put complex electronics together."

"You know you shouldn't eat that. What did the doctor tell you?"

This one really cracks her up.

"Honey...Honey! Honey, you know that's bad for the baby. Don't make me assert my authority."

Comments
on Jun 29, 2006
You know what's better for the baby than the curved bottle? Mother's milk, straight from the breast.

Congrats! Hope your wife is feeling well.
on Jun 29, 2006
What is a curved bottle?
Why did you have to go there Tex? Breast might be "best" but not everyone can do it.
Seriously can open worms everywhere.

Congratulations on your impending daddyhood. What's wrong with Gabrielle? I like Gabriella.
on Jun 29, 2006
Why did you have to go there Tex? Breast might be "best" but not everyone can do it.


The day it's taboo to encourage mothers to breastfeed is the day that our society is sincerely doomed.

Just because you don't like it or had problems with it DOES NOT make it not the best option. It's not the only one, but it is the best.
on Jun 29, 2006
Trina, I have to apologize for being so catty with you. I'm sorry.
on Jun 30, 2006
Thank you Texas and Trina.

My wife has ruled out Gabriell or any version of it. lol.

Except for the 24/7 nausea, she is doing well.

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